The purpose of stone circles, according to Archer

Our recent trip to the Orkney Isles and the amazing Stenness Stones and Ring of Brodgar set me thinking. Despite a great deal of learned discourse and archeological investigation, we still don't fully understand what they were for. Archer must have been around when these imposing monuments were built and he's bound to have an opinion about the real purpose of stone circles...

‘Imaginative people, archaeologists,’ commented Archer, when I mentioned that my mum had been one.

‘What do you mean?’ I asked.

Archeology is supposed to be a science Drew, but a lot of what they term “interpretation” is actually what I would call “guessing,” and some of it is wildly off.

‘For example?’ I demanded, bristling slightly at the daemon's slight towards Mum’s memory.

'You know as well as I do that a lot of complete hogwash has been said about the so-called Pictish carved stones.’

‘Hang on,’ I said. ‘That’s your fault, not the archaeologists. You deliberately misdirected people to hide the fact that the stones were galdr-infused and forcing the ælves to stay in their own territory.’

‘OK then, stone circles,’ he replied. ‘Many people in your mother’s profession have built careers from pontificating about the deep and meaningful purpose they were built for. Dark, mystical stuff involving the Solstice and people prancing about in silly clothes. All total bollocks.’

The Ring of Brodgar, Orkney. Photo by Rona Dodds

‘I think you’re confusing archeology with Outlander,’ I said. ‘But go on then. What were they really used for?’

‘Cattle markets.’ Back then everyone needed to buy and sell cattle, so it made sense to have somewhere to do it.’

‘Pull the other one,’ I told him. ‘Why would Neolithic people put all that effort into dragging massive stones into position just for a marketplace?’

‘Brutal things, Neolithic cows,’ he grinned. ‘All horns, hooves and attitude. It was important to have something solid to duck behind if one of them had a go at you. Besides, they’re not just shaggy shit-factories you know. Back then, they were a source of food, milk and hides. They really mattered, so it was worth building a fitting place to buy and sell them.’

I still wasn’t buying it. ‘Wait a minute, what about the alignment of the sun at the solstice? Some of these stone circles are perfectly lined up. You can’t tell me that’s a coincidence!’

Archer pulled a beautiful half-hunter watch from his waistcoat pocket, flipped open the cover and tapped it with his forefinger. ‘No clocks or calendars in those days. They needed something to tell them when the next auction was due.’

‘You’re just taking the mickey out of me, aren’t you?’ I asked.

He looked offended. ‘Not at all. I think you’re forgetting the key reason I know better than your mother’s pals about these things. I was bloody there!’

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